It's funny how the first post was about my day 1 in Melbourne, but now here I am, preparing to leave.

As I pull out the 'Welcome' booklets to pack into a cardboard box, my initial excitement upon arrival suddenly hits me. I suddenly remember how it felt to be going to the university of my choice—the trepidation, the anticipation of moving to a new state, and starting a new life.

Now, I'm moving out of Melbourne and back home.

I don't know what to feel.

On one hand, I am happy to go home. I have missed everyone in my family, and I have missed the ease of travelling around and having so many things to do and places to go to for fun. In Melbourne, although the city is beautiful, and there are many cafes, but I do not think it is particularly my type of lifestyle. Not that it matters anyway, because I like to stay at home.

I loved my experience at Monash.

It was the perfect environment for me to flourish academically, and I am sad that I'm about to leave. I will miss the cold weather and the comfortable learning environment. The Macs in the library, and the small but lovely campus. I will miss being an absolute nobody, and not having the pressure to make friends or take part in university activities, while having abundant opportunities should I want to.

Although it is ultimately my decision, I'm not sure if I was the major influencer of that decision.

I am afraid.

I'm not sure what the future will entitle.

I'm transferring to a university back home, but I'm not sure if that's enough to make me happy. I'm not sure if I can keep up with the competitive pace and the bell curves. I'm not sure if I can get along well with my peers, and I'm not sure if I'll feel small when everyone around me has already made friends.

But I want to believe I'll be able to do it.

And I know I always have the people around me to rely on.

I've finally arrived in Melbourne.

Today's the first day and it's full of trepidation and hesitation.
I haven't had a chance to really look around the university but everything I've seen so far seems great, and everyone has been really nice. The residents in the hall I'm living in seem particularly so, as they call a 'hello' or 'hey' when I walk past.

What I'm most worried about is the initial awkwardness and making friends with the other students on campus, as I'm awfully shy when it comes to meeting strangers, a trait I wish to do without. Hopefully in the upcoming social events that have been organised both by the residential hall and the school for orientation will allow me to at least get a few new names in my contacts and I'll hopefully not be so lost.

I'm thankful that I at least have Janet to rely on in Melbourne, which would make exploring and familiarising myself with the city infinitely easier.

Tomorrow I'll probably go look around the campus I'm staying at and go to a shopping centre to stock up on some other necessities I missed during my initial shopping trip today. Today was so hectic that I wasn't able to take any nice photos of my surroundings, but I'll hopefully get to it tomorrow.

It still feels somewhat surreal that I'm going to be living alone for the next few years, and I'm worried but also excited for what the future may hold.